


Worth It

by Silvergray1358



Category: South Park
Genre: Blood and Gore, Boys Kissing, Character Death, Crying, First Kiss, Heavy Angst, Hopeful Ending, Idiots in Love, M/M, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Not Really Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-17
Updated: 2018-06-17
Packaged: 2019-05-24 07:56:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,016
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14950673
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Silvergray1358/pseuds/Silvergray1358
Summary: Butters never has any memory of watching Kenny die and maybe that's why Kenny can find the courage to do something he'd usually never dare to do.





	Worth It

     Dying hurt.

Not all the time, Kenny McCormick had come to learn. After all these years, the high school graduate had died so many times he figured he must have experienced it all. Sometimes death would be so quick he barely had time to register his last breath before the bright, morning light would blind him as he sat upright in his bed the next day with a gasp. 

Other times though, like now…

He laid on the street pavement in the middle of the now-barren road. Red pinpoints of taillights in the distance disappeared around a corner as the car and the drunk driver that had run him over slipped into the darkness. 

Kenny’s right hip had exploded into screaming pain when the front of the vehicle nailed it first and shattered the bone like it was porcelain. His body ragdolled down underneath and the passenger side tires rolled over the middle of his sternum, bouncing him under the car’s metal frame before leaving him to land on his back. The black sky was speckled with stars and the blond watched his foggy breath get pushed from his lungs into the cold air. 

He had heard a distant ‘snap’ sound, like a dry twig, as the back tire hit him but at least now he couldn’t feel much of anything below his ribs.

Kenny’s chest however had excruciatingly caved in when the majority of his ribs had been crushed down into the road. Both lungs were lacerated and he knew that it’d be impossible to breath soon as his lungs filled up with blood. He probably only had a couple of minutes left, if that. 

It had been worth it though. Kenny knew he had succeeded pushing Butters out of the way in time.

     The small blond bundled up in his favorite, teal coat had been crossing the street towards Kenny when the car had careened around the corner.

     Kenny, neither a stranger to death nor afraid of it anymore, hadn’t been concerned for his own wellbeing  for a second. His friend was way more important and he had heroically dashed into the street to shove Butters back the way he came.

     Now, as Kenny twitched and shivered on the freezing ground, he was gifted the vision of his friend’s unharmed face above him.

     “Aw gee, Ken, look at ya. No, no, no,” Butters whimpered. His voice was choked and pained as he took in the sight of the other boy’s broken body. Kenny knew he had to be a mangled mess but he pulled Butter’s attention back when he fumbled a hand up to cup his face. It was a long way to reach though for his shaky arm and his hand slipped down to the side of Butter’s neck and held on tight to stay there. 

     His skin was warm there where Kenny’s fingers grazed the short, buzzed hair at the base of Butter’s skull. The wind rushed over them, whipping the longer, platinum blond hair on the top of his head and cutting through the fabric of Kenny’s orange parka and the very core of him. 

     “Leo…” Kenny said on a breath. It was raspy and the next pull of air was laborious. 

     “I’m so, so sorry Kenny. Please don’t go. Y-you can’t die, you’re my b-best friend,” the smaller boy sobbed through his stutter.

     Kenny noted how even when he was sad, his friend was beautiful. The smooth, pale skin that tinged pink over his soft cheeks, the doe-eyed look in his bright-blue eyes now rimmed red with tears, the way his light hair looked like glowing, polished silver in the light reflected from the moon…

     These deaths were selfishly Kenny’s favorites.

     He loved the rare chances he got to be held in Butter’s arms while death caught up to him like it always did. He knew how badly these times hurt his friend, but he also knew that the other boy would have no recollection of any of this the next day. 

     It was because of this last fact that Kenny could find the courage everytime he wound up here to force himself to close the tiny distance between them. 

     The weakening blond pulled Butters down hard and their lips met. It wasn’t the first time, but as far as the other boy knew, he shared his first kiss with Kenny McCormick kneeling on the ground as his friend died slowly in the quiet of the night. 

     Kenny could taste his own blood in his mouth so he didn’t try to deepen their kiss. Instead, he just savored the silky feeling of Butters’ lips against his own chapped ones, the way the warm breath from the other boy’s nose ghosted over his freezing face, and how sweetly Butters squeaked in surprise.

     His stiff mouth finally melted against Kenny’s and he pressed harder against his friend, returning the sentiment with passion.

     Just like every time.

     When Butters finally pulled back, Kenny saw a smudge of blood on the other boy’s bottom lip. He wished he could reach over and wipe it off of Butters’ innocent face but his hands were numbing out and his arm fell between them, useless.

     “No, Kenny. No,” Butters whispered as he shook his head.

     “Don’t be sad, Butterfly,” Kenny said. The sound was gurgly and wet, but clear enough. More than anything he wished he could say something,  _ anything _ , to reassure Leopold but even if he had more time, more oxygen, he had no clue where to begin. 

     Kenny’s vision swam as his brain started to lose oxygen but he tried to watch Butters’ face for as long as he could. 

     Maybe tomorrow he’d finally have the courage to kiss his friend for real. Maybe he’d actually tell the other boy how every day Kenny’s heart beat for him. Maybe Kenny didn’t have to be on death’s doorstep for Butters to return his feelings.

     Maybe for once Butters would smile after Kenny kissed him instead of cry. It was always so hard though the next day to find the courage, but…

     Maybe it was worth it.


End file.
